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Blizzard Tries to pull off Biggest "White Lie" ever in upcoming World of Warcraft patch

Seige of Ogrimmar
Siege of Orgrimmar
     Blizzard Entertainment has announced on September 10, 2013 Seige of Orgrimmar patch 5.4 will launch to dethrone the games biggest douchebag, Garrosh Hellscream. They also announced World of Warcraft's future and how they are going to try and pull off the biggest "white lie" in MMORPG history, to save the top franchise ever from its imminent destruction.

     Love it or Hate it, World of Warcraft is and has been, the top Massively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game (MMORPG) in video game history. Wow at one time had over 13 million "paying" members, which has drastically declined to at last report 8 million and dropping. To anyone with half a brain losing half your market has to be a "red flag" that something is wrong. So we looked into detail on what is going wrong with the MMORPG powerhouse;

Wrath of the twerk king     Social Interaction is almost gone, which is the basic need for MMORPG. Since 8 million people can't be on the same server, WOW has many "Realms"  for people to play on. Since half the games players have now left, this leaves some of the realms "dead" or very little play going on. The logical thing would be to drop the smaller realms and merge them. Experts say this downsizing would be the end of the game. So instead, (here comes the white lie to save face) we are making "virtual realms". You can join a guild and play on a different realm, but not actually be on that realm. O'Rly? Blizzard is banking on that its players are a forgiving race, or that they a bunch of complete morons that can't see lawyer double-talk.

     Virtual Realms will save alot of the gamers from leaving the game, but still doesn't solve some of the big reasons why people left in the first place;

     1. Auction House Whores:  players that do nothing but sit in the auction houses (which is the games economy) and keep people from selling their items, so that they (the squatter) can sell theirs by underbidding.  Some go as far as "stalking" players till they stop putting things on the auction house. This is my personal disliked pet peeve of the game and everyone of you doing this crap can choke on a murlock egg.
     2. Everyone thinks they are a "Troll": Either people are bored or gained an ego that they are great, but the bashing of other players has increase to the point that people are quitting the game.
     3. No Sense of  Progression: If you not getting anything out of it, why play? Doing quest dailies and then more quest dailies, and for what? To just say that the group likes you? It is a game of gearing, if you don't get Upgrades your not progressing. Running hundreds of LFR's (looking for raids) to get gear and not getting anything at all, turned alot of people off from playing anymore.
     4. Made everything you do in the game worthless: Professions have become a complete waste of time, anything you make is useless and of no value, when all you have to do is run a dungeon or raid and get way better. Yes professions do have bonus' to gear (extra stats for having profession) but the work going into leveling the profession outweighs its bonus. Which turned many people off and quit playing because, why play a game that everything you do means nothing.
     5. Pvp (player vs Player) is nothing more than cheaters and multi-box players: One of the favorite things about Wow is to go against other players. The fun is lost when you go against a team of 10 (all with the same name +a number) or your whole team goes against 1 person and amazingly you all disconnect and die while he lives. Kind of like little league team going against 9 steroid-filled Derek Jeters. You already know the outcome, why play?
     6. Blizzard afraid to lose customers by banning players: I have personally seen and they brag about it, people cheating at the game and are still playing the game today. The honest player is fed up 'grinding' hours upon hours to get materials to sell when joe schmo con artist just clicks a program and comes back in a day and destroys the honest players game livelyhood. "honest player has left the building"

     To Blizzards credit they have fixed alot of problems and not actually their fault for what is happening. The old saying goes even to this day "One bad apple will spoil the lot".  They did announce there will be another expansion that will tie all expansion together and will announce details at this years BLIZZCON.


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Bob "Bull Patty king" of Michigan

Bob "Bull Patty king" of Michigan
according to duck dynasty fans, everyone important needs a title

What Tv has taught me

What Tv has taught me
this post in no way reflects the opinions and views of the hurtz donut company, fine makers of apples, oranges and meme buns