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What if? Hollywood was done with baseball trading rules




Hollywood has just announced it will be changing its format, joined with other countries, that now will include such things as baseball's free agents and trading concepts. Hollywood would like to put on the trading block Kardashians for a player to be named later. Hollywood would also like to send Justin Bieber back the the canadians for an undisclosed amount of money and one member of the duck dynasty clan.

 Hollywood is willing to sign Emma Watson to multi-year contract but will have to send Daniel Ratcliffe to the minors


open on the table is downton abbey for the jersey shore

My personal experience with Hero Worship


I learned about Hero Worship at a very young age:
The Detroit Lions that I Have seen and admired my many years of TV, was doing a Holiday charity basketball game in then town of Houghton Lake Michigan in which I lived. I was so excited to see these guys that millions of people cheered and looked up to. After the most excited game, I was picked to go into the locker room and get an autograph. What a present I just got! This is by far one of the most thrilling things that ever has happened to me. As I was escorted in, my body shaking from excitement. All i can do is look down at my legs that are shaking that i will see and meet what so many will never, ever do. They will be so envious of me. And I pause with excited extacy and look up with sheer pride... a very wet man, dripping wet, naked, in front of me, in flip flops and naked in front of me, in flip flops and.... in that moment of time and space and perpetual bliss, without being told by any kid, adult or God himself... I have learned that in fact...there is no such thing as a hero and santa claus.
Signed
Bob "I seen Tiny people" err i mean "BadDawg" Dilts


p.s. I also learned that that is no such thing as a "stereotype" either..and I will leave it at that

What if?..The Bible was a "facebook" transcript


Okay, so because my mind is truely warped and I can admit that. Purely in jest and comic view point. If your mad about it, you really should seek a God or a DOCTOR. None of us was actually there so What If?:
The bible was in fact true, but.... Was actually a transcript of someones "Facebook" page of the current time?

thou shall not twerk for thou is a hoe bag in thine eyes

thou government is drunkards and crookedth politicians that sitdth on thier high horses and look down on the meek. this is an obama-nation to me.

Did thou not Catchth the new CSI;Miami last night: verily i say on to you that totally inherited the kingdom of god

Got me a 8-point sacrifice last night in the woods. thou cutest it into jerky and fed it to the children it was most pleasant in thine eyes.

 And on the 6th day Jesus created the heavens and the itenary to mexico, for thine trip is good in thine eyes. Thou will seekth family. Thou will only use American Airlines and American Airlines only, for the price is less costly in thine eyes

Duck Dynasty Is Fake!

Leave Phil alone people, just face it, you got the gay and like afrojoe said in his post on facebook, not like he said the N word.. In the book of Stiffus 6:9 does it not say - Come on ye Dudes, for the Vagina has more to offer and Let him have his freedom of speech and get out of jail free card. For it is said Stiffus 7:1 if you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all
:(this post in no way reflects the opinions and views of the hurtz donut company, fine makers of apples, oranges and meme buns)

News blames Miley Cyrus for "worse twerk fail ever" viral video, turns out to be FAKE!

twerk video turns out to be fake
News quick to blame Miley Cyrus for Video
     Viral Video posted on youtube titled "Worst Twerk Fail Ever" gets 9 million hits and creates a lynch mob from News Outlets that are quick to blame Miley Cyrus VMA performance for the video. Hundreds of News stations broadcasted the video and many tried to get petitions to have Miley from ever being on VMA's again using this video as proof that she influences young adult into doing stupid things. Documentaries  on the dangers of twerking were in the planning stages. The biggest twerk of them all is: "It was Fake!"
     Jimmy Kimmel pulls off the Ultimate twerk of them all and stages the hoax that gives proof that news is hungry for a hanging. As if you was watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail (burn the witch), news has been bashing Miley for her performance. Which quite frankly wasn't shocking nor original, but the hunger for controversy got the better of main stream media. Jimmy Kimmel proved that by just posting this staged video on youtube and the news took the bait.
     Guess we need to point fingers around and blame the real problem, the news. You have influenced people in believing things that are made up and staged. You have effected many in your deceit and poor judgement in broadcasting what you believe as news. You have created  backlash and harassment to celebrities all for the sport of selling your product. Who Knows how many more things that you have reported as "real" was actually your lack of following the facts and pure lies. Speaking for the people against your poor judgement "You Sir, You Should be Banned!"


Positively Inaccurate Headline News (PHN) week ending

bringing you the news while medicated with Jack Daniels
Positively Inaccurate Headline News (PHN)

Bringing you the News as we see it: (while medicated with Jack Daniels)

Famed and critically acclaimed scientist, Doc Emmit Brown, plans one more trip Back to the Future in hopes to find Singer, Billy Ray Cyrus, and hand him a condom.

Tim Tebow has been reportedly been cut from the New England Patroits. This removal may be the end of his career. Fans respond to this news by saying "Who's Tim Tebow?"

Justin Timberlake defends Ben Affleck for being the new Batman, Our sources report Mr Timberlake responded by saying "He can never be as bad as the guy who played Daredevil"

Chris Jenner's talk show gets Cancelled so she tries to One-Up Daughter Kim Kardashian. Reports say she and Husband Bruce Jenner had a sex tape and hope it don't ever get leaked out to the public. Our Sources respond by saying: " For the love of all that is holy and safe in the world.. burn that tape!"

Our Top Notch staff has found out the United States plans to invade Selena. The reasons are not quite clear why USA has a problem with Selena Gomez, but it could be because of reports of her new movie "Getaway" may be the worse movie ever and USA don't want that to ever happen again.

Federal Agents Raid suspected Cleveland fake NFL knockoff Jersey Store to discover 40,000 rounds of ammuntion, 18 assult rifles, 3 9mm handguns and four shotguns. According to the store owners attorney, the owner is a merely a "survivalist" in case of a apocalyptic event. In related news, Cleveland Browns chances to win the Superbowl rates just above "when hell freezes over"


Ben Affleck's Batman audition tape leaked!

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Bob "Bull Patty king" of Michigan

Bob "Bull Patty king" of Michigan
according to duck dynasty fans, everyone important needs a title

What Tv has taught me

What Tv has taught me
this post in no way reflects the opinions and views of the hurtz donut company, fine makers of apples, oranges and meme buns